i'm in a very strange mood today. i've had a very busy, stressful, and tiring week or so and i'm really out of gas.

i started full time at michaels, which caused all kinds of petty, immature and vindictive bullshit at my real job. that has been somewhat resolved. not to my satisfaction, or to my benefit really, but resolved, nonetheless. this on top of the everyday stress that already surrounds that job, as we've not made any more headway on the problem of next season.

learning a new job has been really frustrating. i was really dropped into a sink or swim situation and it's really annoying to be learning more new things everyday i show up for work, at this point. there are a lot of things i'm expected to magically know, or pick up instantly. i had forgotten how annoying customers can be.

i heard today that one of the tenants in my building, on my floor, died a week and a half ago. it was on my floor, but i'd been working so much i hadn't been there for the hub bub. there had been a really foul stench on my floor for a few days, but i tried to pass it off on my crappy neighbors. it turns out that this guy who lived down the hall, and weighed approximately 500 lbs. (that's no exaggeratin'), had passed away but hadn't been found for about a week. i'd passed him in the hall, or on the sidewalk outside a few times and we'd always said hi but i didn't really know him. for some reason i can't stop thinking about it. i think it's the idea that nobody noticed he was gone, and so it took a week to find him. his truck is still parked outside, he'll never drive it to work again, and it's full of his everyday stuff that will never get used again. it's a weird idea.

now the hallway smells like disinfectant.